Big love,
Christopher

LAHS Welcomes New Health Teachers

By Valerie Zhou, Senior Writer, The Talon

On a campus rampant with raging teenage hormones, being a high school Health teacher may not seem like a dream job. Los Altos High School’s three new Health teachers disagree.

Last year, LAHS’ long-term and only Health teacher, Vickie Christensen, retired, prompting the Mountain View-Los Altos District to hire a fresh set of teachers: Lewis LaHood, Christopher Pepper and Tad Jinguji.

Since the previous Health curriculum hadn’t seen many changes, the newly-formed team has jumped in head-first, working tirelessly during lunches and prep periods to create an entirely new curriculum that is as high-quality and engaging as possible.

“We’re meeting all the time, in every spare moment we have,” LaHood said. “We are planning this whole thing out together because we really want to bring a fantastic health program to the school.”

Although the three teachers have known each other for less than two months, their skill sets seem to align.

A Unique Opportunity

“This is the best team that I’ve ever worked with,” Jinguji said. “We all have different experiences, and our strengths seem to be in different areas, so when we work together, it’s phenomenal.”

While the three new teachers admit it is unusual for a school to only have male health teachers, this presents LAHS with a unique opportunity.

“We as adult men get to model being comfortable talking about topics like periods and pregnancy,” Pepper said. “It shows that men can speak up as advocates against gender-based harassment and violence.”

All three teachers are aware that they need to more consciously make the topics covered in Health less taboo, and they are designing the course and building classroom cultures accordingly.

“In this class, everyone is safe,” Jinguji said. “We respect everyone, we welcome everyone and we care about everyone.”

Lewis LaHood

In high school, LaHood always felt like his P.E. teachers and football coaches were living the dream.

“I was like, ‘Man, they’ve really got the life,’” LaHood said. “It just looked like so much fun.”

To chase that dream, LaHood began his career as a part-time P.E. teacher for Scotts Valley High School near Santa Cruz. He was offered a full-time position at the end of his third year, but only if he could switch to teaching health.

One of LaHood’s favorite parts is the age group he teaches. Although his students range in both age and maturity levels, LaHood says it creates balanced discussions of the material.

“Often the upperclassmen have had more experience with the things we’re learning about, and they can give great perspectives,” he said. “On the other hand, the freshmen are new to everything and they can be really objective.”

In his classroom, LaHood says he tries to inform rather than influence.

“I try to teach my students as much information as possible,” he said. “Then, they can critically think about what their values are and make the decisions that are best for them.”

One of LaHood’s biggest goals is to build individual relationships with his students, which he says will make awkward conversations much easier.

“I just want my room to be a space where kids feel free to laugh,” LaHood said.

In fact, that love for community brought him to LAHS. In 2016, LaHood’s former school and LAHS played a game so memorable that it’s stuck with him ever since. Although LAHS won 13–10, LaHood said everybody on the team was incredibly respectful.

“I was so impressed with their sportsmanship,” LaHood said. “I could tell they were playing the game the right way.”

For LaHood, the energy and enthusiasm from the students and coaches at that game sparked in him the dream to work at LAHS.

“I knew that if I ever left Scotts Valley, Los Altos would be at the top of my list,” he said.

In April, a position for health opened up at LAHS and LaHood jumped at the chance. Through his two months here so far, he’s happy with his decision.

“The energy on campus is so positive,” LaHood said.

Now that a new season has begun, LaHood is excited to get into football at LAHS.Despite having a smaller role on the football team than he’s used to, LaHood said he’s itching to get more involved. In the next few years, LaHood and his family plan on moving up towards Los Gatos, so he’ll be able to take on a larger coaching position while still being present for his family.

“I want to be 100% in,” he said. “I’m really excited to learn how LAHS’ team operates and see a different side of high school football and team culture.”

Christopher Pepper

Even straight out of high school, Pepper had always known that he wanted to work in health.

“Studies about health education and all that technical stuff are the sorts of things I nerd out on,” Pepper said.

Pepper started his career as a health journalist, working on getting information on the environment and health to the public. Now, his audience has gone from the confused public to confused teenagers.

“I saw that there was a real need for teenagers to get health information,” Pepper said. “They often didn’t have access to accurate information about health or their bodies.”

When he was in high school, the AIDS epidemic was at the forefront of public attention. At the time, health education took a fear-based approach: Don’t have sex or you’ll get AIDS! Don’t do drugs or you’ll die! Pepper says the programs he grew up with taught him what not to do.

“It was a scary time to learn about health because there was a real overlay of fear around death,” he said. “But creating a lot of fear or worry isn’t a good way to motivate positive choices.”

Pepper disagrees with the negative stereotypes surrounding teenagers.

They are not simply asking for more information. They are asking for guidance that helps them make sense of that information, align decisions with their values and build healthy relationships. Those insights suggest that preparing young people for sexual well-being requires more than delivering facts. It requires equipping them with the skills, confidence and support to navigate the complexities of adolescence.

Yet these priorities rarely shape how we design programs, evaluate success or decide what belongs in the classroom.

“Teenagers are really interesting; it’s a really dynamic time in life,” Pepper said. “They are going through a lot of change and developing into the people that they will be in the world.”

He said his journalist background lent itself to Health education, as both careers are about making information digestible for the public.

“The creation and curation of a Health class is a lot like being an editor,” Pepper said. “Both involve looking for the best materials we can find and how to reach an audience as effectively as we can.”

To get through to his students, Pepper says he prioritizes transparency and reflection in his teaching.

“You need a combination of information and care to connect with teenagers,” Pepper said. “I try to be honest and truthful, let them enjoy the stage of life that they’re at.”

Tad Jinguji

Jinguji was floating through retired life when he felt pulled back to full-time teaching.

“I did some substitute teaching, but it just wasn’t fulfilling,” Jinguji said. “I really missed getting to see students and creating those relationships.”

Jinguji has done a little bit of everything in the education world: Health, P.E. and life sciences in both middle and high school. Jinguji has even credentialed other teachers at Sacramento State University.

But even after teaching for over 25 years, Jinguji still feels as if he’s constantly learning — from his wife, who is the principal at Monta Loma Elementary School, to his students.

“My wife’s a way better teacher than I am,” Jinguji said. “And with my students, I learn just as much from them as I hope they do from me.”

Jinguji said his passion for teaching and learning comes from the values he was raised with: to always take advantage of educational opportunities.

“Education wasn’t ever something that you do, but something that you get to do,” Jinguji said. “We’re blessed here in the United States to get free education, and we want to take advantage of that because it’s the foundation of the life we build.”

Jinguji’s role as a mentor doesn’t end once the last bell rings. He believes that the field is just an extension of his classroom, as evidenced by the many pennants decorating his classroom walls. This year, he is an assistant coach for the football team and is in talks with Athletic Director Michelle Noeth about coaching other sports as well.

“It’s a different type of growth in a different environment, but yet it’s still the same,” he said. “I’m teaching, I’m supporting and I’m building those relationships with my kids.”

Jinguji’s love for coaching is influenced by his own experience in sports. In high school, he was a three-sport athlete in football, basketball and baseball. Through his time on various teams, he learned to value relationships and connection deeply — something he carries into his teaching.

“My understanding of being a teacher is, yes, health is important, P.E., science, all of it is important,” Jinguji said. “But we’re in the people business. We don’t just teach subjects, we teach people.”

Recent Teen Health Today Highlights

• How To Talk To Teens About Sex And Consent

  And why teaching high school health class seems so important right now

• Channel Your Rage Into Action Against Rape

  Effective actions we can take today

• VIDEO: W. Kamau Bell & Christopher Pepper (co-author of TALK TO YOUR BOYS)

  A crucial conversation about consent, sex education, rape prevention, and men.

• The Cast Of “This Is Us” Shares Our Parenting Advice

  How “acting like a cat” may help you connect with teens

If you enjoyed this post, please forward it to someone else who might like it, and click the ❤️ or 🔁 button on this post so more people can discover it on Substack. 🙏🏼

I hope you are doing ok this week. As you might know, I started a new job in August - I’m teaching high school health education full time. I LOVE it, and I am also often EXHAUSTED (if I owe you an email, I’m sorry!)

This class is only one semester long, so to make it work, we teachers need to plan thoughtfully and keep up a brisk pace. Since school started, in addition to a lot of community building, we have covered sleep, nutrition, and mental health.

It’s now mid-October, and ALL of my classes between now and winter break in December will be focused on substance use, harm reduction, emergency first aid, bystander intervention, and comprehensive sexuality education.

I posted a note recently about these upcoming topics and some people thought I had redesigned to the curriculum in response to the sexual assault at Cornell University.

The truth is I haven’t changed the calendar at all - this is just what we cover in a modern high school health class.

I feel SO FORTUNATE to have the time and space to talk about these issues with teenagers, and to guide them through activities where they can reflect on their values, practice decision making, and ask real questions. It’s part of why I think health classes are so important.

Thank You For Telling People About Talk To Your Boys

I want to thank everyone who has been sharing our book Talk To Your Boys with parents and educators. We’ve had a flurry of interview and speaking requests, and it’s great to hear that people are finding our book useful.

How To Talk To Your Kids About Sex and Consent

There are lots of specific tips from the book in this LA TImes video featuring my co-author Joanna Schroeder. She explains how we can talk about sexuality and consent with our kids with respect and empathy, and at what age we should start.

CNN: It’s Time For Those Awkward Conversations

I was interviewed by Dr. Katie Hurley, the author of “Breaking the Boy Code: The New Playbook for Raising Resilient Boys.” for this important CNN story. Here’s a bit of our conversation:

“Adults should lean on the tools they have like books and tips but also accept that they have to have awkward conversations,” warned Christopher Pepper, health educator and co-author of “Talk to Your Boys.” Embracing the awkward shows boys that it’s okay to speak honestly about topics that might feel embarrassing.

Keep it brief, clear and consistent

There’s no room for ambiguity when teaching boys not to rape or assault girls. Pepper suggests 5-minute conversations with specific agendas and a focus on values and expectations. Consider these talking points:

• Consent means getting a “yes” every step of the way, from holding hands to touching and other sexual activity. Never assume one “yes” covers every scenario.

• Substance use disqualifies consent. If a girl is inebriated, think about ways to help her get home safely. Call for a ride, make sure she isn’t left alone, and ask for help if you need it.

• Enthusiasm needs to be present on both sides. Both parties should feel respected and enjoy the experience.

• If you have to convince her, you don’t have consent. Coercion in relationships can be subtle, but it is harmful.

Here’s a link to the full piece:

• Boy Parents Need To Have Those Awkward Conversations About Consent, Feelings, and Rape.”

Have You Seen These Videos?

I’m so happy with how these two videos came out and want to make sure you’ve had a chance to check them out

W. Kamau Bell and I talk about consent, raising kids, and how to get more men invested in stopping sexual assault.

Kaamna Bhojwani, Shafia Zaloom, and I have a rich, nuanced, reflective discussion about how to change the way we talk and teach about sexuality and consent.

Two More Talks Worth Your Time

There’s been a tremendous amout of discussion of the Cornell case in the media, and I’ve read and listened to a lot of it. Here are two podcasts that really stood out and made me think.

This Is So Awkward: “Sexual Assault and Consent”

• Show description from Less Awkward: The story of the “Cornell 7” gang rape has sent shockwaves across the country. As details emerge, a parade of issues have follow, from disturbing legal loopholes to the impact of media on young people’s behavior to the responsibilities of bystanders. We are joined by Dr. Debby Herbenick, professor and researcher on young people’s sexual behavior, to discuss a way forward. The Cornell case is not singular –– how do we guide young people to ultimately prevent assaults from happening in the first place?

Call Her Daddy: “I Am Jane Doe”

• Show description from Call Her Daddy: Join Alex in the studio for an important conversation with feminist philosopher and author Kate Manne about the Cornell sexual assault case that has sparked a national conversation and the powerful movement behind the words “I Am Jane Doe.” Together, they examine why survivors are so often questioned instead of believed and why our society seems more concerned with the consequences for accused men than the trauma experienced by women. From fraternity culture and consent to victim blaming,

Thanks to everyone who was able to join my recent conversation with live. Here’s the full recording if you want to watch or share it.

This video is also posted on , where it paired with some insightful commentary about Saturday Night Live and Shane Gillis.

RELATED LINKS

If you enjoyed this post, please forward it to someone else who might like it, and click the ❤️ or 🔁 button on this post so more people can discover it on Substack. 🙏🏼

Resources mentioned in the video:

• Shafia Zaloom’s website

• Channel Your Rage Into Action Against Rape - Effective actions we can take today from Christopher Pepper’s Teen Health Today newsletter

• The 5Ds Of Bystander Intervention

• Ever Forward Club
  Ashanti Branch’s organization

• Giving the Talk - Julia Feldman’s Instagram

• Safe Bae - Youth-Led Sexual Violence Prevention

• The New Drug Talk
  The drug landscape has changed. Here’s how to talk to your kids about it.

• Outside the Manosphere

  Includes a list of positive influencers and organizations to follow

• Peggy Orenstein’s resource page

• Peggy Orenstein’s books:

  • Boys & Sex

  • Girls & Sex

Get more from Christopher Pepper in the Substack app

Available for iOS and Android

Get the app

I was addressing a group of fraternity members inside their frat house.

It was 1994, and and I was a volunteer with the University of Missouri-Columbia’s rape education office, something I started doing after a high school friend told me about her own assault.

Because I was one of the few men who’d been through the peer educator training program, the coordinator asked me to do this evening talk on Fraternity Row.

I headed in with a list of talking points, an easel, and some chart paper.

The audience members, who got some sort of community service credit for attending, seemed both a little defensive and little bored. I was very green as a speaker, and the presentation was a lot more “lecture-y” than what I would deliver now - lots of legal definitions and warnings about how much jail time could result from a rape conviction, and little of the nuanced talk about enthusiastic consent that a modern college presentation would include.

I was never a fraternity member myself and have never attended a frat party, but that talk and the brief glimpse inside “Greek Life” it provided have been on my mind as I read the horrible news from Cornell University this week.

Here’s a summary of the situation from :

Last week, a woman identified as Jane Doe, a former Cornell University student, filed a 100+ page civil lawsuit in New York’s Supreme Court in which she described being drugged and sexually assaulted by seven other students for hours during a Chi Phi fraternity party in 2024. The filing includes screenshots from a Snapchat group, “Chi Phi Activities,” in which one of the men announced that “free pussy” was available for anyone interested. The plaintiff was drunk when she arrived at the party, so incapable of consent.

On Tuesday, the Cornell University Daily Sun ran an editorial titled “Cornell Won’t, We Will,” condemning the school’s response to the allegations and to the students involved. The editors list the names of the seven men identified in the lawsuit and address them directly: “We know who you are and we refuse to let you benefit from this University’s concealment,” a direct callback to the University’s own assertion that “Only those who perpetrate sexual violence benefit from its concealment.” The fact that it’s an opinion piece gives the student board a little more First Amendment latitude than might otherwise be the case, but it takes bravery to do what they did.

Since the story broke, it’s consumed my social media feeds. My “Talk To Your Boys” co-author has been filming TikTok videos about it, and my friend (and “Talk To Your Boys” contributor) Jeff Perera has been filling up his Instagram feed with posts about it.

If you want to read more about this story, here are some of the best pieces I’ve seen:

• The Three Most Chilling Words In The Cornell Rape Case Texts (Washington Post)

• How a Cornell Student Went From Shame to Action (New York Times)

• The Culture that Enables the Cornell Seven ( for )

• What It Feels Like at Cornell Right Now ( In The Cut)

• A Long Read About Living in a World Where Men Publicly Bond over Women’s Humiliation and Pain ()

• I was Raised to Believe All Men Were Bad. Then I Had Two Sons. ()

• Educate Your Damned Sons. ( in Feminism For All)

• Fraternities Are Dangerous for Men Too ()

• Every Woman You Know Is Reeling About The Cornell 7 ( with )

• How Could the Cornell 7 Have Gone Along With Rape? Here’s What Parents Need to Know About Peer Pressure (Beth Greenfield in She Knows)

• What Goes on Inside a Rapist’s Head? ()

It’s been a long time since I gave that first talk at a fraternity, but I’m still regularly discussing similar issues with young people.

I teach health education in a public high school, and some of my students are getting their college applications ready right now. Unfortunately, it’s all too easy to imagine them in future situations like the one at Cornell, and I want to do all I can to make sure that doesn’t happen.

I’ve been wrestling with the question of “What concrete actions can we take to create a sexually safer world for teens and young adults?”

Here are my best suggestions

1. Talk To Your Boys

“Talk Yo Your Boys” is the title of our book, but it’s also intended as a call to action from me and my co-author .

We believe that caring adults need to be having ongoing, nuanced conversations with boys all through adolescence and young adulthood. The challenging thing is that many of the conversations tween and teen boys most need involve topics that are awkward to talk about or hard to introduce, and thus often just don’t happen.

When Joanna and I discuss the book with schools or parent groups, people tell us how much they appreciate the practical tips and scripts we provide for how to talk about challenging topics like pornography, consent, racism, and bystander intervention. In the book, we try to provide enough support and scaffolding that people move from “Oh, I know I should be talking to my son about that” to actually having the conversations.

A lot of parents have been reading “Talk To Your Boys” together in book groups, starting as early as when their sons are in 4th grade. called it “a brilliant and beautiful book,” after she read it (alongside ’s “BoyMom”) with a group of mothers at her son’s school.

We poured our hearts (and everything we have learned as parents and educators) into this book, and really want people to use it. I hope you find it helpful.

2. Study This Canadian Self-Defense Program

I’m fully on board with implementing programs aimed at boys and men and working to change their attitudes and behaviors so that they commit fewer sexual assaults.

Should we also teach self-defense to women? On this topic, I think Canadian activists like Julie S. Lalonde are worth listening to. Here’s what she recently posted on LinkedIn:

“Teaching feminist self-defense to girls and women is *not* victim blaming. Knowing what effective sexual violence resistance looks like and choosing *not* to teach those skills to girls and women because... optics? is not my kinda feminism.

If you're angry about the Cornell 7 (and the million other cases just like it!) then may I suggest supporting evidence-based solutions? The Flip the Script with EAAA program is *the* most effective rape resistance program in the world.

Here’s how the program’s developers describe it:

• The Flip the Script with EAAA (pronounced E-triple A) program is a 12-hour small-group, evidence-based intervention designed specifically for 17–24-year-old university students of all sexual identities who identify as women. The program is based on theory, research evidence, and best practices for providing young women with the knowledge and tools to defend themselves against attempts to sexually coerce or assault them.

Evidence it works

• The results of a randomized control trial of the program were published in the New England Journal of Medicine. Women who took EAAA experienced a 46% reduction in completed rape and a 63% reduction in attempted rape in the following year compared to women in the control group. Other forms of sexual violence were also significantly reduced. Reductions in sexual assault continue to be evident two years later.

What Actually Happens in This Program

• This trauma-informed, highly interactive curriculum is delivered by two well trained, near-peer (women under the age of 30) facilitators. They lead four 3-hour units, designed to provide a positive, fun empowering environment for young women, and focus on these topics:

  • Unit 1: Assess: recognize risk cues for sexual violence in situations and in men’s behavior

  • Unit 2: Acknowledge: identify and overcome personal obstacles to prioritizing their own sexual rights in acquaintance situations

  • Unit 3: Act: develop a toolbox of effective strategies to defend their bodies and boundaries

  • Unit 4: Relationships & Sexuality: explore their relationship values and sexual desires

• The content consists of mini-lectures, games, audio and video clips, individual, small, and large group application activities, and 2 hours of empowerment self-defense. The units can be offered on different occasions (e.g., 4 Wednesday evenings) or grouped (e.g., 2 units on Saturday and 2 on Sunday in a single weekend).

This also works with high schoolers

There is a version of this program for girls ages 14-18 called Girls – Flip the Script with EAAA that has shown promising results:

• in a randomized controlled trial measured six months after the training, the diverse 14- to 18-year old girls in Ontario who took the program compared with girls in the control group experienced:

  • 76% fewer attempted rapes and

  • 25% fewer completed rapes

  • Results were particularly strong for 14 - and 15-year old girls.

3. Support Comprehensive Sex Education

Comprehensive sex ed is one of the most effective—and most underutilized—tools we have to help youth develop empathy, practice ethical decision making, and cultivate a sense of personal responsibility. It is very effective, not just at reducing unplanned pregnancies and sexually transmitted infections, but also at helping students understand consent, avoid sexual harassment, and establish healthy relationships. Research even shows that sex ed in high school can be a powerful rape reduction tool.

That’s a point Jaclyn Friedman, the founder and Executive Director of EducateUS, emphasizes in this essay:

When I’m asked to share a story about why I’m so passionate about sex ed advocacy, I don’t tell a story about the sex ed I deserved but didn’t get. I tell a story about the sex ed someone else didn’t get, and that I deserved for them to have.

When I was 20 years old, I was sexually assaulted by someone I knew. He wasn’t someone I was dating or even liked, but we were at a party together, and he followed me back to my room uninvited.

In the aftermath, it became clear that this was not a guy who was used to thinking about how his actions affect other people, a guy who had never once considered the concept of consent, and one who definitely didn’t think he would face any consequences if he just took what he wanted. In other words, the guy who hurt me had been failed by his sex and relationships education, and I have been forever harmed by the education he didn’t get.

I’m so grateful to Friedman for sharing her story — I think reflections like this have real power to make change. I hear this as a strong call to action to work for better sex education in our schools.

As Friedman points out, research says that comprehensive sex education is one of the most effective tools we have to reduce sexual assault.

A 30 year meta-analysis of studies on the effectiveness of sex education found, among many other benefits, that quality sex ed reduces the odds that students will be the perpetrators or the victims of violence. It also increases the likelihood that students who see others being targeted will do something to interrupt the abuse. We can also say the inverse is true: failing to teach sex and relationships education in schools increases the odds that students will hurt and be hurt by each other, and that they won’t intervene when they see abuse happening.

Here’s the bottom line: All students deserve accurate information about sexuality and development. I believe that education about sexuality should be happening both at school and at home. We should work to make sure sex ed is being taught well in every school, and support parents in having meaningful conversations about sexuality with their teens. Making sure everyone gets this information is an important and practical step we can take towards building a more equal society, and it’s worth dealing with a little awkwardness along the way.

This video from EducateUS, Jacyln Friedman explains why the organization was founded on the certainty that sex education prevents rape:

Read more:

• Sex Ed in America: From Terrific To Terrible

• Boys, Let’s Talk About Sex

• How To Help Teenagers Become Sex Ed Experts

4. Improve How We Teach Consent

Wondering how we teach consent skills in high schools? I encourage you to listen to ‘Yes Means Yes’: Teaching Teens Affirmative Consent, a radio story that takes you inside the classroom to hear what it’s like to practice this with teenagers. Here’s what I had to say in the story about why we take this “affirmative consent” approach:

Better relationships and better sexual experiences come out of people more fully expressing their desires and their wants, and being comfortable saying what they don’t want and what they aren’t comfortable with.

In “The Key to Curbing Campus Sexual Assault Lies in High School Health Class,” Mic.com reporter Marie Solis explored these ideas in-depth with students and educators, including quotes from me and from California’s 2021 Health Education Teacher of the Year, Shafia Zaloom.

Zaloom is one of my favorite go-to experts in this area. Check out her post, “Teaching Consent,” to learn more about how she introduces conversations about consent with students, and how she gradually leads them through more substantial discussions.

She approaches these concepts from a different angle in this piece for the New York Times, “Tools for Teens to Call Out Sexual Violence.”

When I teach, there are certain questions about sexual assault that teenagers always ask. They want to know, “How do I keep myself safe?” “How can I be a supportive friend and ally?” They also want to know, “What’s the deal with drunk sex?”

Her answers, which she expands on in the essay, are clear and straightforward:

• Promote Respect

• Take Care of Yourself

• Step in to Help Others

Teacher Discount: 50% off Subscriptions

5. Engaging Men - Including Male Athletes - In Stopping Sexual Assault

I was thinking about how much room there is for growth in this area while reading “Prevention Is a Team Sport,” a report from It’s On Us, It’s focused on the thoughts and behaviors of college-aged, male athletes regarding sex education and sexual assault prevention.

Although it’s focused on college students, I think a lot of the key findings apply in middle and high schools, too:

🔑 Young men need accurate sex and consent education: Initial experiences learning about sex – whether positive or negative – have a lasting impact on attitudes and behaviors toward sex, consent, relationships and gender norms. Many male athletes first learn about sex through pornography, which perpetuates myths and misinformation about sex, making accurate sex and consent education even more important.  

🔑 Current trainings are not practical: Effective training must be intentional and specific to college athletes, such as hosting at a time when the athletes can be present physically and mentally and having multiple touchpoints no longer than one hour. Existing awareness and prevention education training programs are often boring, not reflective of campus culture, unengaging and typically conducted online.

🔑 Male athletes believe survivors when told directly, but are often conflicted when they hear about an allegation against a teammate or athlete: Although participants were likely to believe and support survivors when they received a direct disclosure, when they learned about a teammate or friend who had been accused of sexual assault, they expressed concerns about false allegations being levied against themselves or their teammates.

🔑 The athletes were unaware of what healthy – and unhealthy – relationships truly look like: Participants struggled to label characteristics of a toxic or abusive relationship they experienced or witnessed, particularly while the relationship occurred. 

🔑 Male athletes want to help: Male athletes want to do all they can to prevent sexual assault on campus, but no one has shown them how to be active bystanders. 

It’s On Us is working to address these issues by providing tools and trainings to schools across the country and organizing students to educate their peers. Check out all their offerings here: https://itsonus.org

Working with sports coaches may be another way to effectively reach boys:

• Futures Without Violence has an excellent program called Coaching Boys Into Men, an “evidence-based violence prevention program that trains and motivates high school coaches to teach their young male athletes in healthy relationship skills, mental health practices, and that violence never equals strength through 12 weekly discussions.” Here’s a powerful video about the program.

• TeamsOfMen works with coaches of boys’ sports teams to help them incorporate messages of support, ethics, respect, consent, violence prevention, and healthy masculinity. It’s promoted to coaches who “want to coach your players not just to scoreboard wins, but to personal growth.”

6. Teach Bystander Intervention

The organization Right To Be has developed a framework called “The 5Ds of Bystander Intervention” to encourage bystanders to intervene when they see harassment or bullying. Here’s how they introduce it:

What’s worse than experiencing harassment related to your identity? Whether it’s about your race, color, religion, or immigration status; about your gender presentation or sexual orientation; about your size, age, or a disability you live with? Well, what’s worse than being harassed in public is being surrounded by bystanders who see it happening, but do nothing about it.

It doesn’t have to be that way.

As bystanders, we must be especially vigilant and aware of what these harms can look like, so that we’re ready to stand up and intervene.

When we intervene, not only do we reduce the trauma of harassment for the person who was harmed (yes, harassment can cause trauma!)…we also slowly chip away at the culture of harassment, and replace it with one of humanity.

There are youth-friendly videos to accompany each of the 5Ds:

• Distract

• Delegate

• Document

• Delay

• Direct

They also offer lots of free trainings for adults and educators.

If you enjoyed this post, please forward it to someone else who might like it, and click the ❤️ or 🔁 button on this post so more people can discover it on Substack. 🙏🏼

• I’m Christopher Pepper, an award-winning health educator and the co-author of the bestselling book Talk To Your Boys.

• Recently I’ve heard about some amazing youth leadership opportunities that I wanted to share with you. Please check them out and pass along to the young people in your life. Feel free to share widely!

• Writing this newsletter is something I do in addition to my full-time job as public school teacher. It takes time and focus, and I hope you find it useful! The best way to show your support is to become a paid subscriber. It’s a bargain (only $5 a month!), and even less if you use this 30% off coupon.

Get 30% off forever

Apply To Next Gen Men’s Streamer Academy

Next Gen Men’s Streamer Academy is a paid incubator for young men who want to build a real presence in gaming, and become role models worth following. It’s part of ’s and Movember’s Young Men and Media Collective.

• When? Oct 2026-March 2027

• Who is elligible? Young men ages 19-25 across Canada and the United States.

• What is the pay?
  $1,800 CAD a month, every month you’re in the program. Here’s how they pitch it: “Most streamer academies sell you a course or take a cut. We’re doing the opposite. You’re not buying anything, and you keep your channel, your revenue and your brand. That’s what makes this an incubator rather than a course: the investment goes into you.”

• Details:
  Next Gen Streamer Academy runs online over six months. You’ll have a short live training every week and a curriculum portal open 24/7 to access past sessions and resources.

  
  You’ll learn what goes on behind the scenes to stay grounded as a competitive gamer: mindfulness and keeping your head under pressure, resilience and learning from mistakes, and the discipline behind developing your skill in the game.

Application: academy.nextgenmen.ca
Deadline Note: The deadline listed online may be different, but the organizers are accepting applications through Sunday, Sept. 27.

• PSST - Looking for similar opportunities for younger boys?
  Check out this post about Next Gen Men’s Discord Server for boys:
  

Join The Representation Project’s Rep Collective

The Representation Project is expanding its Youth Advisory Council into the Be A Rep Collective, a national organizing community-network program for youth gender justice advocates across the United States.

ABOUT THE PROGRAM

• Launching in Fall 2026, the Be A Rep Collective brings together young people ages 14–25 with different experiences, identities, perspectives, communities, and levels of organizing experience from across the nation. This program is an opportunity for youth advocates who want to build community, strengthen their leadership and organizing skills, and advance gender justice.

The Collective Details:

• Who: Gender justice advocates in the US

• Time: Approximately 4 hours of program activities per month

• Eligibility: Between the ages of 14–25

• Compensation: Earn a completion award of up to $750 for completing the full program.

• You do not need to be an experienced activist or community organizer to apply.

Application deadline: September 30, 2026 (but The Representation Project will be reviewing applications on a rolling basis!)

APPLY HERE: https://forms.gle/CqeBb11uDh6NKzrx5

Join NoSo’s Youth Leadership Initiative

Calling all young people who are passionate about digital wellbeing, mental health, and youth advocacy! 🗣️

NoSo Connection Collective is now recruiting its 2026-27 cohort of youth leaders!

The Youth Leadership Initiative (YLI) is a four-month leadership program for young people aged 15 - 22 who are passionate about digital wellbeing and want to create positive change in their own community!

The youth cohort promotes and participates in NoSo November’s Detox Movement, creates spaces for offline connection within their communities, and advocates or digital wellbeing! Project opportunities include organizing community events, creating art/content/music, writing blogs/op-eds, and much more in partnership with our program partner, Hopelab.

Visit nosonovember.org/yli to learn more about the YLI and apply for this upcoming cohort by September 27th!

Apply For The Born This Way Foundation’s Global Youth Advisory Board

Born This Way Foundation is building out its international Youth Advisory Board (2027-’28 cohort)! Here’s what they say:

We are searching for young people ages 15-24 who are passionate about mental health. Whether you are a leader already making an impact in your community or a young person passionate about mental health seeking an opportunity to get involved, we want to hear from you!

Our team of Youth Advisors will play a pivotal role in the planning and execution of research, programs, and campaigns core to our mission. These Youth Advisors will have the opportunity to be a part of Born This Way Foundation’s legacy and be ambassadors of our work in their communities and beyond.

To view full requirements and learn more about the application timeline, please visit our website.

California Teens: Join TeenSource’s Youth Advisory Board

Teensource is looking for California young people between 15 -21 years old to join its Youth Advisory Board to be an expert in their experience to share their thoughts, ideas, and questions to help make TeenSource more representative of YOU!

TeenSource is a hub for teens to get information about sexual and reproductive health written by and for California youth. TeenSource.org centers the voices of teens in California and is regularly updated to make sure you have the latest youth-friendly information about birth control, STIs, LGBTQ+ issues, and healthy relationships. TeenSource works to engage and empower California teens in collaborative activities that respect and value youth perspectives and promote greater health access and equity for youth statewide.

You can learn more and apply through September 30th at:
teensource.org/hookup/apply-join-2025-2026-youth-advisory-board

Hi readers!

Today I am just filled with gratitude. “Talk To Your Boys: 16 Conversations to Help Tweens and Teens Grow into Confident, Caring Young Men” is one year old this week!

and I continue to be blown away by its success, and we are so grateful to all of you who have purchased copies of the book, recommended it to your libraries, invited us to speak at your schools, conferences, and parent meetings, discussed it in your book groups, interviewed us on your podcasts and in your parenting articles and - especially - reached out to let us know that the book was genuinely useful in their lives.

The book hit the bestseller list thanks to you, and it continues to have strong “word-of-mouth” sales as people recommend to their friends. We’ve pulled together a few highlights from the journey here. Thank you so much for your support!

Big Love,
Christopher

A Wonderful Launch

• We had a standing-room-only crowd at our book launch at Book Passage in San Francisco, where we were in conversation with the legendary Ashanti Branch.

The book was …

• Chosen as one of Greater Good’s Top Parenting Books Of The Year

• Recommended on The Ezra Klein Show by , who called it a “brilliant and beautiful book”

• Blurbed by an amazing set of writers (read what they said here):

  • , New York Times bestselling author of The Emotional Lives of Teenagers

  • Terrance “Terry” Real, bestselling author of Us and founder of Relational Life Institute

  • Eli Harwood (aka @attachmentnerd), therapist and bestselling author of Raising Securely Attached Kids

  • , author of How to Raise Kids Who Aren’t Assholes and Hello, Cruel World

  • Stan Tatkin, PsyD, MFT, author of Wired for Love and In Each Other’s Care

  • , bestselling author of Boys & Sex and Girls & Sex

• Featured on the Aspen Ideas: Health 2025 Reading List and Aspen Ideas To-Go Podcast

• Recommended by host Sterling K. Brown on the “That Was Us” podcast

• Chosen as an Amazon “Best Book” Editor Pick

• Featured in Common Sense Media’s “Raising Healthy Boys” Recommendations

• Named a “Most Anticipated” Selection from

• Selected as a Kobo Best Book

• Named a SlowChatHealth Book Of The Month

• Chosen as a Voice Male Book Club Selection

• Published in the United States, Canada, the United Kingdom, Australia, and New Zealand, and is currently being translated and published for readers in Brazil, Poland, and Croatia.

We’ve Had So Many Great Talks

In many ways, the best part of writing this book is that it has given us the opportunity to talk to parents and educators all across the country. Thank you to everyone who have invited us to join your book groups, speak on your panels, and deliver keynote talks to your staffs, parent organizations, and conference attendees. We love to do these and always learn so much!

Some Terrific Interviews and Media Coverage

• Ask Lisa - Talk to Your Boys: Raising Confident, Caring Young Men

• This Is So Awkward - What Happens When Boys Open Up?

• CNN - Having difficult talks with your son should happen sooner than you might think, expert says

• Priya Parker - A guidebook on how to talk to your boys about everything you’ve been avoiding (with Priya Parker)

• New York Times: ‘Bring Back Bullying’? Online Provocateurs Say They’re Done With Sensitivity.

• Maria Shriver’s Sunday Paper: We Need To Listen To Young Men

• Gender (In)equality: New Book Interview with Christopher Pepper (with Kate Mangino)

• Upworthy: Award-winning health teacher shares why ‘purpose’ is key in rasing boys tot be successful men

• SheKnows: A New Report Warns That Digital Culture Is Defining Boyhood — More Than Parents or Schools

• The Daily Whatever Show with and - Conversation with Christopher Pepper

• Building Boys Bulletin - Talk to Boys: A Conversation With Christopher Pepper & Joanna Schroeder (with Jennifer L.W. Fink)

• To Be A Boy - From Grunts to Growth: Talking Boys with Christopher Pepper

• Fox 2 Detroit - How to Support Boys Through the Challenges of Adolescence

• Provoked with - Raising Teen Boys to Be Confident, Caring Men

• The Untold Story with Martha MacCallum - Talk to Your Boys: Building Bonds Through Better Conversations

• SheKnows - Teens Want Less ‘Stoic’ Men and More Male Vulnerability in Their Movies and TV Shows

• Getting Open - Parents Who Do These 11 Things Keep Their Sons Close, Even Long After They Grow Up featuring Joanna Schroeder

• Minimalist Mama - 16 Conversations to Have With Your Boys

• Voices of Your Village - Sex, Power and Consent: Raising Caring, Connected Boys with Joanna Schroeder and Christopher Pepper

• Well Beyond Medicine - Talking With Teens: Honest Conversations That Build Connection

• Parenting in the Screen Age

  • Part 1: Talking To Your Boys: Masculinity, Gaming, and Their Online Lives

  • Part 2: From Sports Betting to Porn: Parental Conversations Boys Need

• Moms Of Only Boys Podcast - What Boys Wish Their Moms Knew

• How To Talk To Kids About Anything Podcast - How to Talk to Boys about Tough Topics

Read A Book Excerpt

• American Institute for Boys and Men: Talk to your boys: Tips for parents about mental health

• Greater Good Magazine: How to Talk With Boys About Masculinity

Sample Our Audiobook

We love the way the Talk To Your Boys audiobook turned out, with excellent narration from Samantha Desz. Check out this chapter and let us know what you think!

Let’s Keep The Momentum Going:

• We would love to see more reviews of the book online, especially on Amazon and Goodreads. They don’t have to be long - many reviews are only 1-2 sentences!

• If you’d like us to speak to your school or organization about Talk To Your Boys, please email us at ttybbook@gmail.com. We’re open to discussions, panels, presentations, and keynotes!

• If you are a journalist, writer, or podcaster who would like to interview us, please email us at ttybbook@gmail.com. We’d love to talk to you.

• Please continue recommending the book to people - the strongest endorsements come from word-of-mouth suggestions from actual people!

  ---

Recent Teen Health Today Highlights

• How To Love And Support Neurodivergent Learners

  Real talk about school, autism, ADHD, and learning disabilities

• How Amaze.org Can Help You Talk To Teens About AI Nudes, Looksmaxing, And Loneliness

  Every parent and educator should know about this site

• Let’s Rethink What Success in Sex Education Means

  Young people want to know more than how to prevent pregnancy and sexually transmitted infections. Schools should help.

• How To Connect With Teen Boys

  A lot of people are worried about adolescent boys right now. Here are some of my best suggestions about how to better connect with them.

• What Teens Say About Phones In Schools

  How much should students’ ideas influence the discussion?

If you enjoyed this post, please consider forwarding it to someone who might like it, and click the ❤️ or 🔁 button so more people can discover it on Substack. Thanks! 🙏

King is a child psychologist, speaker, and parent educator who specializes in providing therapy and consultation services for children living with autism, anxiety, ADHD, and learning difficulties. She writes the excellent newsletter , and is the creator of The Neurodiverse Classroom, a professional development curriculum for K-12 educators.

I hope you are enjoying the back-to-school transition and finding time for laughter and connection.

Big Love,
Christopher

The Interview: Emily W. King, Ph.D.

Let’s start with the basics: What do you mean when you say “neurodivergent learner”? Why do you like that term, and how do you decide when to use it?

While we are neurodiverse as a population, some of us are neurodivergent. For this book, I define neurodivergence as differences that impact learning and development. Diagnoses that fall under this umbrella and often lead to uneven academic achievement include autism, ADHD, learning disabilities, giftedness, and twice-exceptionality. I love the term "neurodivergent" because it allows someone to share that they learn differently without needing to disclose their diagnosis until they are ready. I always follow a parent's or child's lead on how they identify themselves. In my opinion, we use diagnostic labels in three ways:

1. to gain access to services

2. to help others understand our needs and

3. to help kids and teens identify with others who share their same pattern of neurodivergence.

You've spent more than two decades working with neurodivergent children, and you're also raising two neurodivergent sons. How did those experiences shape this book?

I often say that I learned more from my sons and the clients I have worked with than I learned in graduate school. I think this is true for many of us in the fields of education and healthcare. We learn so much by listening to others, seeing what works and what doesn’t, and truly understanding the limitations that reality can place on clinical recommendations. For instance, we know that smaller student/teacher ratios will help educational outcomes, but the reality is that public schools are severely under-funded. We know that more mental health professionals in schools will help reduce negative behavior outcomes, but we don’t have the staff to meet the needs. While this book shares stories, research, and strategies related to educating neurodivergent learners, I also want to bring awareness that we can do so much to help not only these kids, but all kids thrive.

You explain that children’s nervous systems have to feel safe before learning can happen. How can schools and families create that sense of safety?

In the book, I start by explaining that we have to feel safe first within the physical structure of the building. Sometimes young children do well in a small preschool environment but then struggle in a larger elementary school. Or, a child may do well in an elementary school building and then struggle with the size and transitions of a middle or high school building. We can support kids with routines, visual systems, and safe places to go when overwhelmed to help them feel safe at school.

Next, we need to help them feel safe with the people around them. Most neurotypical students can adapt to or tolerate relationships that aren’t the best fit. For instance, having a teacher they don’t mesh with or sitting next to a peer they find annoying. But, neurodivergent learners may not be able to focus or feel safe in a social dynamic that overwhelms them, which will shut down learning. So, we have to consider the sensory demands of the physical space as well as the relationship safety between educators and peers to help students feel safe.

You write that many behaviors adults label as defiance or laziness are actually signs of overwhelm. How can parents begin to tell the difference?

I often refer to this as telling the difference between a “can’t” and a “won’t”. If a child can’t do something, they likely have not developed the skill yet and they aren’t doing the task in any setting. A “won’t” is often an emerging skill that happens only when a child is rested, fed, connected, and engaged. It’s these “won’t” behaviors that tend to get labeled as a “choice” or “lazy” when they’re really just a variable skill.

Get curious about the patterns of when a child is or isn’t doing something. If they struggle with chores after school but can do them on Saturday morning, this is likely a stamina issue. If they struggle with homework but can do the work at school, they may be benefiting from the structure at school. If something is so overwhelming and no one has ever seen the child do it successfully, we need to pull back expectations and make the task more doable by making it shorter, simpler, or with support until the child can feel successful without becoming emotionally overwhelmed.

Many parents struggle with homework battles, emotional outbursts, or school avoidance. What do these challenges often have in common? How could families respond differently?

Speaking of looking for patterns, homework battles, emotional outbursts, and school avoidance are most often related to experiences of exhaustion or anxiety. See if you can find a pattern of SUCCESS for your child. When do they successfully complete the work they struggle with elsewhere, when are they emotionally regulated, and when do they engage with activities? This will get you and your child’s educational team started with figuring out what IS working and expanding success from there. They may need to only work at certain times of day, they may need more visual structure, or they may need to work with someone outside the family (this can be very true to teens!). Once we figure out what is getting in the way, we can problem-solve the support needed to move the student forward.

One of the most hopeful parts of the book is your emphasis on helping children understand their own brains. How should parents think about talking with children about diagnoses like autism, ADHD, or learning disabilities? At what age do you recommend starting these conversations?

There is no magical age for talking about a diagnosis; however, if a child is engaging in negative self-talk or noticing their differences and believing they have a character flaw, it’s time to talk to them about their brain. I often recommend beginning by helping children understand what they love to do, what their strengths are, and what they need support with. Over time, you can add to these categories and then at some point explain that their pattern of inattention, creativity, and impulsivity, for instance, has a name: ADHD. Then, quickly help them find other people, either in your family or famous people, who share their ADHD profile. When we realize we learn differently, the first thing that helps is not feeling alone.

You regularly lead workshops around neurodiversity. Are there particular topics where you see people really needing support?

My most popular parent workshops often focus on helping parents collaborate with teachers to support their child, while my most popular professional development workshops for educators focus on preventing negative behavior. In general, parents and teachers are both hungry for information to better understand the anxiety and learning of neurodivergent students who are growing up in a world not designed for them.

If you could leave parents with one mindset shift from The Neurodivergent Learner, what would you hope changes in the way they see their child tomorrow morning?

Your child is not giving you a hard time, they are having a hard time. When things are hard, slow down, observe what’s working and what’s not, and make the next best decisions that will lead back to your child feeling safe and supported. Only then can progress begin.

How can people find out more about your work?

• Website: learnwithdremily.com

• Instagram: @emilywkingphd

• Newsletter:

  Learn with Dr. Emily®

  Join 14,000+ parents and educators learning to support neurodivergent learners in a world that wasn’t built for them.

  By Emily W. King, Ph.D.

Recent Teen Health Today Highlights

• How Amaze.org Can Help You Talk To Teens About AI Nudes, Looksmaxing, And Loneliness

  Every parent and educator should know about this site

• Let’s Rethink What Success in Sex Education Means

  Young people want to know more than how to prevent pregnancy and sexually transmitted infections. Schools should help.

• How To Connect With Teen Boys

  A lot of people are worried about adolescent boys right now. Here are some of my best suggestions about how to better connect with them.

• What Teens Say About Phones In Schools

  How much should students’ ideas influence the discussion?

If you enjoyed this post, please consider forwarding it to someone who might like it, and click the ❤️ or 🔁 button so more people can discover it on Substack. Thanks! 🙏

It’s often exhausting, but I am absolutely LOVING it. I’ll be writing more about that soon, but today I wanted to shine a light on one of most useful and creative sites on the Internet, Amaze.org.

Big love,
Christopher

Amaze.org Is Doing Amazing Things

For nearly 10 years, Amaze has produced fun, animated videos to provide young people the information they actually want to know about puberty, sex, their bodies, and healthy relationships. Amaze has produced more than 300 videos across the globe, with nearly 2,000 global adaptations in 70+ languages and dialects.

I was inspired to post about them today because they are hosting a fantastic free online conference in September, and it seemed like a good time to highlight some of the great work they are doing.

SexEdCon2026: Decoding The Manosphere

This virtual event for educators, youth-serving adults, parents, healthcare professionals, and advocates is part of the ongoing “Combatting the Manosphere” series. The videos and corresponding collateral material are produced by AMAZE in collaboration with the LinkUp Lab, a project of and Futures Without Violence.

REGISTER HERE

The conference will be highlighting these resources:

• Boys & Dating: A Guide for Mentors, Parents, Educators, and Coaches

• LooksMaxxing Guide for Mentors, Parents, Educators, and Coaches

• Deepfakes (AI Nudes) Guide for Mentors, Parents, Educators, and Coaches

• Gaming Guide for Mentors, Parents, Educators, and Coaches

  ---

What Amaze Offers

Amaze leverages the expertise of master sexuality educators, the creativity of animation professionals, the input of young people, and the power of the internet to provide adolescents around the globe with medically accurate, age-appropriate, affirming, and honest sex education they can access directly online—regardless of where they live or what school they attend. It also offers an array of high-quality resources for parents and educators. Take a look…

For young people

• Sex education videos that are engaging, educational, age-appropriate, and often humorous.

For parents and guardians:

• Amaze strives to assist adults—parents, guardians, educators and health care providers around the globe—to communicate effectively and honestly about sex and sexuality with the children and adolescents in their lives.

For educators and healthcare providers:

• Toolkits, lesson plans, promotional materials and other resources to help refer students and young patients to AMAZE as an available, free and fun resource to learn about sex and sexuality.

My Own Amaze Connection

In the summer of 2023, Futures Without Violence invited me to talk to a group of teenagers. These young people were part of a leadership program focused on healthy relationships, which started with a week-long training institute. The teens met with adults who shared wisdom about relationships and sexuality as they prepared to initiate their own projects. I was one of the week’s first presenters, and I decided to go big with my message.

I told these teens they should all become sex ed experts. Here’s why.

Those teens made the most of the information they learned that week, and ended up creating a whole website and campaign dedicated to ending “Teen Economic Abuse.” It’s great - you should check it out.

Later, those same teens have partnered with Amaze.org to make animated videos obout ending teen economic abuse.

Here’s the focus of the first video:

• Are wondering if you should give your partner money?

• Does your partner pressure you to spend money in ways you don’t want?

• Discover the hidden signs of teen economic abuse and learn how to protect yourself and your friends! Take control of your financial future.

Here’s the focus of the second video:

• Are you wondering if you should compromise on your dreams because they can cause tension between you and your partner?

• Does your partner pressure you to make decisions that don’t align with your passion?

• Discover the power of managing conflict in relationships and learn how to communicate what you truly want!

A Favorite Throwback

P.S. Fun fact - I’ve been a superfan of Amaze for a long time! Back in 2019 they invited me to takeover their social media for a day, and they made a cartoon version of me. Here’s what I look like AMAZE-ified!

Recent Teen Health Today Highlights

• Let’s Rethink What Success in Sex Education Means

  Young people want to know more than how to prevent pregnancy and sexually transmitted infections. Schools should help.

• How To Connect With Teen Boys

  A lot of people are worried about adolescent boys right now. Here are some of my best suggestions about how to better connect with them.

• How Did Cigarettes Come Back Like This?

  Why are so many people lighting up now? PLUS: The parent of a school shooter faces sentencing, ADHD linked to social media use in boys, and thoughts on Jimothy.

• What Teens Say About Phones In Schools

  How much should students’ ideas influence the discussion?

If you enjoyed this post, please forward it to someone else who might like it, and click the ❤️ or 🔁 button on this post so more people can discover it on Substack. 🙏🏼

Big love,
Christopher

As Students Head Back To School, Let’s Rethink What’s Success in Sex Education

By April J. Bell, The 74.

As millions of young people head back to school this fall, parents are buying backpacks, teachers are preparing lesson plans, and policymakers are once again debating what belongs in the classroom.

One topic will predictably return to the center of those debates: sex education.

Too often, the conversation begins and ends with one question: How do we prevent teenagers from becoming pregnant or acquiring sexually transmitted infections?

Young people are asking something different.

They want to know how to build healthy relationships, communicate boundaries, recognize misinformation, make decisions they feel good about, and imagine futures where their sexuality is a source of confidence rather than fear.

That disconnect matters.

While adults continue designing policies and programs around what we hope adolescents avoid, many young people are focused on who they hope to become.

For decades, our public conversation about adolescent sexual health has been dominated by prevention. Success is typically measured by declining pregnancy rates or lower rates of sexually transmitted infections. Those outcomes matter. They always will.

But they tell only part of the story.

What are the real aims of sex ed?

If preventing harm is our only goal, we overlook the very capacities that help young people make healthy decisions in the first place: confidence, communication, agency, access to trustworthy information, supportive relationships and the ability to envision futures they value.

Research consistently shows that adolescents define sexual well-being far more broadly than adults often assume. They talk about respect, trust, communication, emotional readiness and feeling informed.

My own research with Black adolescents supports this. Young people are eager for conversations about sexual health that extend beyond avoiding pregnancy and sexually transmitted infections. They want space to talk about relationships, pleasure, communication, consent, identity and how to navigate conflicting messages from peers, social media, families, and schools.

For Black adolescents, this narrow focus is especially consequential. Their sexuality is too often approached through risk, control and surveillance rather than possibility, agency and support.

They are not simply asking for more information. They are asking for guidance that helps them make sense of that information, align decisions with their values and build healthy relationships. Those insights suggest that preparing young people for sexual well-being requires more than delivering facts. It requires equipping them with the skills, confidence and support to navigate the complexities of adolescence.

Yet these priorities rarely shape how we design programs, evaluate success or decide what belongs in the classroom.

What approaches really work?

Research examining three decades of school-based sex education shows that comprehensive programs can help young people develop healthy relationship skills, recognize misinformation, respect sexual diversity and strengthen their ability to recognize and respond to dating violence and sexual abuse. The most promising approaches are not one-time lessons focused only on risk. They are age-appropriate, inclusive and designed to build knowledge and skills over time.

But access to that kind of education still depends heavily on where a young person lives. In its 2025 state report cards, SIECUS: Sex Ed for Social Change gave only seven states grades an A, while more than one-quarter received an F. Oregon and Washington earned A grades. The scores reflect whether state policies support medically accurate information, contraception, healthy relationships and LGBTQIA+-inclusive instruction, among other measures.

State policies do not tell us exactly what happens in every classroom. Still, some school districts are showing what a broader approach can look like. Seattle Public Schools uses a curriculum and supplemental lessons that address consent, communication and healthy relationships alongside pregnancy and sexually transmitted infection prevention. Families can preview the lessons and access resources to support conversations at home.

To be clear, preventing pregnancy and sexually transmitted infections remains critically important. No one is arguing otherwise.

But prevention should not be mistaken for the ultimate goal.

Keeping our desired outcomes in focus

Back-to-school season reminds us what we expect education to accomplish. We don’t judge schools solely by whether students avoid dropping out. We also ask whether they are learning, growing, thinking critically and developing the skills they need to thrive.

Adolescent sexual health deserves the same standard.

Yet we continue to evaluate success largely by what young people don’t do. Did they avoid pregnancy? Did they avoid infection?

Those are important outcomes, but they are not the only ones that matter.

What if we also asked whether young people left school feeling more prepared? More confident communicating with a partner? Better able to recognize misinformation online? More equipped to make decisions that reflect their own values? More capable of building relationships grounded in mutual respect?

Schools and districts should evaluate whether students leave sex education better able to communicate, assess information, establish boundaries and make decisions consistent with their values, not only whether pregnancy and infection rates decline.

These are not “soft” outcomes. They are foundational skills that support lifelong sexual health and well-being.

Ironically, they are also some of the strongest tools for preventing the very outcomes our policies are designed to reduce.

This all works together

The choice is not between prevention and well-being.

Well-being is one pathway to prevention.

Expanding what schools teach and measure will require meaningful engagement with families. Parents should receive clear information about what will be taught, how lessons differ by grade level and how they can review the materials. Schools should make space for questions, communicate in the languages families use and be clear that sex education is not intended to replace conversations at home.

Schools and families have different but complementary roles. Schools can provide medically sound information and practical skills. Families can help young people understand that information in the context of their beliefs and values.

Schools should take parental concerns seriously without treating the loudest opposition as representative of all families. In a 2021 survey of Minnesota parents, approximately 90% said comprehensive sexuality education should be taught in schools. Where families have a legal right to opt their children out, schools can respect that right without allowing individual objections to narrow what is available to every student.

If we truly want healthier futures for young people, especially Black adolescents who too often encounter systems built around surveillance instead of support, then we have to stop asking only how to prevent harm.

We also need to ask how to prepare young people to flourish.

As students return to school this year, we should expect more from sex education than the absence of negative outcomes. Like every other part of education, it should give young people with the knowledge, skills, confidence, and agency they need to navigate the world they live in.

Recent Teen Health Today Highlights

• How To Connect With Teen Boys

  A lot of people are worried about adolescent boys right now. Here are some of my best suggestions about how to better connect with them.

• How Did Cigarettes Come Back Like This?

  Why are so many people lighting up now? PLUS: The parent of a school shooter faces sentencing, ADHD linked to social media use in boys, and thoughts on Jimothy.

• What Teens Say About Phones In Schools

  How much should students’ ideas influence the discussion?

• How To Talk About Immigration And America

  Some big questions to think about during America’s 250th birthday party

• The Cast Of “This Is Us” Shares Our Parenting Advice

  How “acting like a cat” may help you connect with teens

If you enjoyed this post, please forward it to someone else who might like it, and click the ❤️ or 🔁 button on this post so more people can discover it on Substack. 🙏🏼

I learned a lot while researching and writing Talk To Your Boys with , and I’m always grateful to share some of that knowledge with new audiences. Recently, ParentData asked me to update an article I wrote for them that’s proven popular on the site, and I’m glad to be able to share an except with you here. I hope you find some peace and joy this week!

Big love,

Christopher

Why Adolescent Boys Are Struggling

I served as an advisor to Common Sense Media on its “Boys In The Digital Wild” research, which surveyed over 1,000 adolescent boys across the country. Nearly half of these boys said they “believe they must follow unwritten rules. like not crying or showing fear. to avoid being teased or picked on.”

That survey also found that three in four boys age 11 to 17 regularly encounter masculinity-related posts about building muscle, making money, fighting, dating and relationships, or weapons (even when they don’t go searching for this content), and that boys who encounter more of these posts are lonelier and less open about their feelings.

What can parents do?

If you have a young son, it may be useful to spend a few minutes thinking about his future. Imagine him at 25. At 30. At 40. At 50. What kind of relationships do you want him to have? How do you want him to treat people? How would you like to see him deal with conflict? How do you imagine him contributing to his community?

When I do this exercise, I get a pretty strong image in my head. I want my boys to become men who are connected to their feelings and are comfortable expressing a full range of emotions. I want them to be able to maintain supportive, caring relationships. I want them to have a sense of purpose in life, and to actively look for ways to help others.

Making that future a reality requires teaching some specific skills, and doing a lot of listening. Throughout the tween and teen years, parents need to do everything they can to stay engaged with their boys and keep the lines of communication open. When your son is talking, put your phone down, nod and ask clarifying questions, and don’t rush to fill awkward silences.

Learn about their world and their interests. Let them tell you about the songs, memes, games, and videos that have their attention. Try to stay curious rather than giving advice or passing judgment.

Establishing this rapport will make it easier to talk about more challenging topics, like sexual harassment, consent, or drug use. If you are having trouble introducing more substantive topics, try these conversation starters from the Global Boyhood Initiative or pick up a deck of “Cards For Masculinity” from Next Gen Men.

Continue Reading (there’s a lot more!) in ParentData.

Talking About Boys On Wisconsin Public Radio

For parents, raising boys to be good men has always been a daunting task, and the internet and other cultural factors have made it more challenging than ever. Jennifer L.W. Fink the author of the book “Building Boys: Raising Great Guys in a World that Misunderstands Males,” and I joined the Wisconsin Public Radio show Central Time to talk about how to raise boys in today’s climate. LISTEN NOW

I was grateful to be included as one the experts providing advice in this KQED Mindshift article by Phyllis L. Fagell — Christopher

6 Ways Educators Can Bolster Boys’ Social Skills

At a time when rates of loneliness are rising among young adults and researchers report that 15- to 24-year-olds spend nearly 70% less time socializing in-person with friends than they did two decades ago, boys face some distinct challenges.

For instance, in their 2021 report, “The State of America’s Boys: An Urgent Case for a More Connected Boyhood,” researchers Michael Reichert and Joseph Derrick Nelson note that boys feel pressure to conform to societal expectations about masculinity, such as being stoic, dominant and competitive. That may help explain why boys are more likely to experience physical and verbal bullying and why they’re less academically engaged than girls.

Here are six ways educators can help boys acquire the skills and traits they need to strengthen their relationships and thrive at school. READ MORE

Boys Are Suffering Too. Here’s How We Miss That.

Dr. Lisa Damour, whose work we featured recently in Teen Health Today, recently wrote this very smart essay for the American Institute for Boys and Men. I found this section especially compelling:

Parents and educators now routinely ask me how they should respond to the growing interest of many boys in the broadly offensive ideology of internet influencer and self-proclaimed misogynist Andrew Tate. I always find myself navigating a double reaction in these conversations. Personally, I am appalled to think that some boys are letting themselves be taken in by this material. Professionally, I know from nearly thirty years of clinical practice that no kid who feels good about himself becomes drawn to hateful worldviews.

For most of us, it’s easier to feel compassion for those who suffer from anxiety or depression than to summon sympathy for those who hole up in dark corners of the internet, compulsively gamble or play video games, act out, or spout hate. Further, the externalizing symptoms which boys are more likely to exhibit are often addressed with nothing beyond a disciplinary response, especially for boys of color.

But if we are going to do right by our boys, we need to see past the negativity on the surface to recognize underlying distress that deserves our compassion and help. People who feel whole and worthy don’t build themselves up by degrading or hurting others, and those who have healthy strategies for managing life’s inevitable challenges don’t need to soothe themselves by getting lost in pornography, video games, or gambling.

Read the whole essay here.

Thank you for reading! A special thank you to those of you supporting Teen Health Today with a paid subscription on Substack. Your generosity is the sole reason I’m able to devote so much time to this project. Remember that teachers get a 50% discount - Christopher

P.S.: Another way to support Teen Health Today is by purchasing books through our page on Bookshop.org, where we feature many of the books discussed in this newsletter.More stories about teen boys in the news

Recent Teen Health Today Highlights

• How Did Cigarettes Come Back Like This?

  Why are so many people lighting up now? PLUS: The parent of a school shooter faces sentencing, ADHD linked to social media use in boys, and thoughts on Jimothy.

• What Teens Say About Phones In Schools

  How much should students’ ideas influence the discussion?

• How To Talk About Immigration And America

  Some big questions to think about during America’s 250th birthday party

• The Cast Of “This Is Us” Shares Our Parenting Advice

  How “acting like a cat” may help you connect with teens
  

Read more

• I’m Christopher Pepper, an award-winning health educator and the co-author of the bestselling book Talk To Your Boys.

• Almost every week, I send out Teen Health Today articles that are free for all to read - the most recent is “What Teens Say About Phones In Schools”

• In addition, I regularly curate collections of news stories and essays like the one you are reading right now. Think of me as your friend who keeps up with everything and sends you the most interesting stuff.

• To read this whole post you’ll need to become a paid subscriber. It’s a bargain (only $5 a month), and even less if you use this 30% off coupon.

Get 30% off forever

In this edition:

• I’ve Studied Hundreds of Mass Shooters. Parents, I Hope You Know The Story Of Colin Gray.

• Cigarettes Are Back In Vogue. How Did This Happen?

• RFK Jr.’s Flawed Claims About Sperm Count and Fertility

• New Study Links ADHD Symptoms In Boys And Addictive Social Media Use

• How Do Young People Feel About AI? 7 Teens Weigh In

• They Watched TikToks About ADHD, Anxiety And Cancer. Then They Worried They Had Them

• The Phenomenon of Jimothy And What It Means About How We Treat “Wayward” Bodies

I’ve Studied Hundreds of Mass Shooters. Parents, I Hope You Know The Story Of Colin Gray. (Slate)

By Nina E. Cerfolio: On July 28 and 29, Colin Gray will be sentenced at the Barrow County Courthouse in Georgia. This March, he became the first parent in American history to be convicted of murder for a school shooting carried out by his child. A jury took less than two hours to convict him on 27 counts for his role in the Sept. 4, 2024, shooting at Apalachee High School, where his 14-year-old son Colt killed two students and two teachers and wounded nine others with an AR-15-style rifle given to him by his father. Colin Gray didn’t carry out the shooting but was found guilty of second-degree murder, involuntary manslaughter, reckless endangerment, cruelty to children, and knowingly allowing his son to have a weapon. He faces up to 180 years in prison.

It isn’t the first time a parent has been charged in a shooting carried out by their child. But it is the first second-degree murder conviction for a parent, establishing a new legal standard. It also raises a question the rest of us now have to answer: What are we going to do about the children we can still save? READ MORE

Cigarettes Are Back In Vogue. How Did This Happen? (Washington Post)

Read more

One of the places this change has shown up most clearly is in schools, where phone use has become a major area of contention. Teachers complain about how distracting phones are and how much they interfere with learning, and news reports say that phones are making fights both more common and more vicious.

In 2024, I shared what I learned from teaching in a middle school while it was implementing a new phone policy in “California Wants To Ban Cell Phones In Schools. I Have Strong Feelings.”

The proposal I discussed in that post, the Phone-Free Schools Act (AB 3216), was eventually signed into law, and it required public and charter schools in California to adopt policies limiting or prohibiting student smartphone use by July 1, 2026.

The newsletter explains the changes here:

“The Phone-Free Schools Act asked communities to decide what works locally and to involve students, educators, and families in shaping those decisions.

In other words, the policies students will experience this fall weren’t written by legislators. They were shaped in school board meetings, PTA conversations, principal offices, and student councils.

That shift may become one of California’s most important contributions to the broader movement distraction-free learning. The question is no longer whether or not schools should restrict phone usage on campus.

The question now is: How should communities design phone-free learning environments, and who should be involved in those decisions?

The California Partners Project also created this guide with specific suggestions for parents who want to make sure their school district has a clear plan and is going to actively implement it.

How To Get Youth Involved

Although this whole issue is about them, we often don’t hear that much about what young people think should be done. That’s why I was so intrigued to learn about the “Call Me Maybe” project from .

Here’s how its Executive Director, , explains the initiative:

In early 2025, as schools rushed to implement new policies before the start of the upcoming school year, we realized there was a small window to do something different. We accelerated our grantmaking process and launched a rapid response challenge, quickly funding organizations and school districts that weren’t just asking, “Should students have phones?” They were asking, “How do we build policies with young people instead of for them?”

Over the past school year, we’ve watched our grantees, four nonprofits and two school districts, take approaches that went far beyond simply restricting phones. They invited students into the policymaking process from the very beginning, helping them understand the “why” behind new rules and empowering them to become ambassadors for the changes. They paired phone policies with restorative justice circles to resolve conflicts before they escalated, and reimagined what students could do instead of scrolling by introducing music during lunch, opening outdoor spaces, and creating more opportunities for connection. In every case, the goal wasn’t just to reduce screen time. It was to build school cultures where young people felt ownership, trust, and belonging.

To tell this story as fully as possible, Young Futures partnered with documentary filmmaker Yoelle Gulko to capture these stories firsthand.

The first video in the “Call Me Maybe Storytelling Series” is out now. In it, Daniel Merrin from the School District of Philadelphia’s Office of Climate and Culture takes viewers inside two Philadelphia high schools. Students and educators talk about what changed when young people were invited to shape phone policy instead of simply following it.

Hancock encourages you to watch this 10-minute documentary with a young person in your life, or share it with educators and policy makers thinking about the future of phones in schools. Future videos will focus on schools in New York and California.

“My hope is that it helps expand the conversation beyond whether schools should have phone policies and toward how schools engage young people in shaping their communities. Phone policies are one opportunity, but the larger lesson is that when students are trusted with meaningful responsibility, schools see stronger buy-in, and young people develop the kinds of skills that help them thrive now and long after they leave school.”

Recent Teen Health Today Highlights

• The Cast Of “This Is Us” Shares Our Parenting Advice

  How “acting like a cat” may help you connect with teens

• Should Parents Be Tracking Their 18- to 25-Year-Old Kids On Their Smartphones?

  Navigating the line between safety and autonomy. PLUS: A deep dive into Andrew Tate’s “empire of abuse,” and a look at who is fighting to keep Kratom legal.

• I’ve Worked At The Same Place For 24 Years. Today Is My Last Day.

  Ch-Ch-Ch-Ch-Changes

• Pimples, Boobs, And Body Hair: On This Podcast, Teens Help Younger Kids Understand Puberty

  Kids have LOTS of questions about puberty. The teens on Brains On: Puberty give them real answers.

If you enjoyed this post, please forward it to someone else who might like it, and click the ❤️ or 🔁 button on this post so more people can discover it on Substack. 🙏🏼

The United States is celebrating its 250th birthday this week. American readers, in addition to joining joyous “Take Me Home, Country Roads” sing-a-longs (which you should definitely do!), I would love to encourage you to think about the kind of country you want to live in, the values that are important to you, and how you’d like us to treat immigrants and refugees.

Seeing the wonderful mix of people visiting North America as part of the World Cup actually provides a great opening for this kind of talk. I’ve written up some questions for reflection in this post - feel free to bring these up with your friends and family, or just think about them for yourself.

Big love,
Christopher

Reclaiming The ‘Best Thing About America’

Recently, New York Times columnist Michelle Goldberg made the case that America should proud to be a land of immigrants:

“I just think it’s the best thing about America, quite simply. It’s the thing that we have historically done better than others. We absorb immigrants. We integrate immigrants. I still am very sentimental about the Emma Lazarus poem on the Statue of Liberty. Historically, we’ve gone through these periods of racial nationalism like we’re in right now, where people want to define America as an ethnic community, and periods of civic nationalism where America is about ideas and values that are open to anyone who is willing to do the work of embracing them.”

I think we all should be having big, broad conversations about immigration, and as a high school teacher of course I’d love to see teenagers participating in those discussions. Here are some prompts to get you started:

Big Questions To Consider

• How hard do you think it should be for people to come to the U.S. to work?

• How hard do you think it should be for people to become U.S. citizens?

• How welcoming do you think we should be to people who are fleeing war or violence?

• How welcoming do you think we should be to people who say they want better economic opportunities for themselves and their families?

• How big of a priority do you think border and immigration enforcement should be in the federal budget? 　　

• Do you think we should give amnesty to undocumented people who are already living in the United States, like Ronald Reagan did in 1986, or lay out some other pathway to citizenship?

• Do you think we should provide specific protections for people who were brought to the U.S. as children, like Deferred Action for Childhood Arrivals (DACA)?

• Canada welcomes three times more immigrants on a per capita basis than then the U.S. Do you see anything in Canada’s immigration policies and goals that you think the U.S. should adopt?

Want More To Think About?

Listen to this special epiode of KALW’s “Notes From The Edge” about America at 250. Here’s how host describes it:

“We speak to the New York Times columnist (and Charlottesville resident) Jamelle Bouie, one of our leading voices on how history finds its way into our present-day politics and culture. We also speak to Paul Farber, the co-founder of Monument Lab, someone who has thought a lot about monuments, memory, and public space.

And in a segment we’re calling Music Notes, we pose the question — what is your ideal national anthem? — to three of our favorite artists: the musicians Leyla McCalla and La Doña and the film director, author, and multihyphenate artist Julian Brave NoiseCat.”

What I Learned From Visiting Ellis Island

History teacher Jenna Vandenberg recently wrote about the hope she found in a visit to Ellis Island:

Once upon a not-so-long-ago time, the USA quickly and efficiently processed millions of immigrants. Ellis Island processed 12 million immigrants between 1892 and 1954. Over a million entered the United States in 1907 alone. Most immigrants arriving at Ellis Island were processed in a few hours. No passports, visas, or papers were needed to enter the United States through Ellis Island.² For most people, getting through Ellis Island took only about 3 - 5 hours. And then they were off to their new lives in America.

When I tell this to my students, many of whom have helped their families sort through piles of immigration paperwork, their mouths drop open in flabbergastment.³

Those who say things like “immigrants today need to follow the rules, just like my ancestors did,” generally have no idea what they are talking about.

I’ve been to Ellis Island myself, and paid particular attention the exhibit on Norway, where I took this photo:

My family roots are in Norway. In the 1800s, things were pretty rough there, and like a lot of Norwegians, they came to the U.S. to escape poverty and famine, with hopes for a better life.

Even back then, immigration didn’t sit well with everyone in the U.S., according to this Washington Post story:

“For the vast majority of their shared history, including the period in the mid- to late 1800s and early 1900s that comprised the biggest wave of immigration to the United States, Norway might have been on the president’s so-called manure pile.

European immigrants of that time fueled many of the same fears about immigration we see today, and politicians fought to close the nation’s borders back then as successive waves of migrants from different European countries faced hostility upon arrival in the United States.

Today, those immigrants are idealized as a fast-assimilating group that came over with nothing but the shirts on their backs, and handed their children the American Dream. Some place them in sharp contrast to what they see as the insular communities of present-day immigrants such as those called out by the president. But it only appears that those migrants assimilated quickly because past economists only looked at a moment in time, instead of following individuals throughout their lives.”Despite the challenges, I am so grateful that the United States made room for my ancestors, and made it possible for us to build a life here.

I appreciate the many immigrants who help make my community vibrant and wonderful, and I want our country to keep making space for newcomers and refugees. Warmly welcoming people who want to come here seems a lot more likely to produce a positive, bright future for our country than walls, bans, or raids.

What do you think? Share your thoughts in the comments.

Recent Teen Health Today Highlights

• The Cast Of “This Is Us” Shares Our Parenting Advice

  How “acting like a cat” may help you connect with teens

• Should Parents Be Tracking Their 18- to 25-Year-Old Kids On Their Smartphones?

  Navigating the line between safety and autonomy. PLUS: A deep dive into Andrew Tate’s “empire of abuse,” and a look at who is fighting to keep Kratom legal.

• I’ve Worked At The Same Place For 24 Years. Today Is My Last Day.

  Ch-Ch-Ch-Ch-Changes

• Pimples, Boobs, And Body Hair: On This Podcast, Teens Help Younger Kids Understand Puberty

  Kids have LOTS of questions about puberty. The teens on Brains On: Puberty give them real answers.

Hi Readers,

and I had a thrill this week when we heard actor Sterling K. Brown spreading the word about our book Talk To Your Boys on the “That Was Us” podcast with Mandy Moore and Chris Sullivan. There’s a clip avove, and here’s the full episode if you want to check it out.

Like many people, Brown first learned about the book when Priya Parker recommended it on The Ezra Klein show. For us, both first-time authors, having people share Talk To Your Boys with the world is just amazing. Thank you to all of you who have been spreading the word!

Big love,

Christopher

Fresh Advice For Parents Of Boys

In today’s newsletter, I’m sharing some highlights from a recent interview and I did on the The MOOBment Podcast. “MOOB” stands for “Moms Of Only Boys,” but most of the advice we shared applies to all parents. It’s always fun when Joanna and I get to talk together about all the things we learned while reasearching and writing Talk To Your Boys.

Some of the concepts we discuss here:

• Boys are often not getting enough emotional guidance at home, leading them to seek advice online, where they may encounter harmful influences.

• There is a generational shift: boys today are caught between old stereotypes and new expectations, often feeling left out of empowerment conversations.

• Boys benefit from having a wide range of options for self-expression, interests, and careers.

• In-person social connections and friendships are crucial for boys’ development; online interactions do not fully replace real-life experiences.

• Effective communication with boys involves curiosity, not assumption—ask open-ended questions and look for cues rather than imposing feelings.

• Conversations with boys often happen during shared activities or at unexpected times - our advice is to stay present and be ready to engage when opportunities arise.

• Respect boys’ interests and use them as entry points for connection and teaching empathy and responsibility. Yes, that might mean listening to them recount their latest video game victories in granular detail!

• Model your own emotional regulation and self-care out loud so boys learn healthy coping strategies.

• Community support (e.g., parent groups, book clubs) helps parents share experiences and strategies for raising boys.

• Men, pay attention to the advice Terry Real shares in our book - do your own emotional work to avoid passing on unprocessed issues to you children.

• Maintain open communication with boys from early childhood through young adulthood; don’t withdraw as they become teens.

• Cherish the teenage years as a time of growth and connection, not just challenge.

• Provide a safe space for boys to share, but also teach about privacy and boundaries as they mature.

The full interview is available for free on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, and Youtube.

Recent Teen Health Today Highlights

• Should Parents Be Tracking Their 18- to 25-Year-Old Kids On Their Smartphones?

  Navigating the line between safety and autonomy. PLUS: A deep dive into Andrew Tate’s “empire of abuse,” and a look at who is fighting to keep Kratom legal.

• I’ve Worked At The Same Place For 24 Years. Today Is My Last Day.

  Ch-Ch-Ch-Ch-Changes

• Pimples, Boobs, And Body Hair: On This Podcast, Teens Help Younger Kids Understand Puberty

  Kids have LOTS of questions about puberty. The teens on Brains On: Puberty give them real answers.

• Caffeine Pouches And Teens: What You Need To Know

  How much buzz is too much? PLUS: America’s masculinity crisis, and why are TikTok references being inserted into old books?

• I’m Christopher Pepper, an award-winning health educator and the co-author of the bestselling book Talk To Your Boys.

• Almost every week, I send out Teen Health Today articles that are free for all to read - the most recent is “I’ve Worked At The Same Place For 24 Years. Today Is My Last Day.”

• In addition, I regularly curate collections of news stories and essays like the one you are reading right now. Think of me as your friend who keeps up with everything and sends you the most interesting stuff.

• To read this whole post you’ll need to become a paid subscriber. It’s a bargain (only $5 a month), and even less if you use this 30% off coupon.

Get 30% off forever

P.S. Don’t Forget About Dads: Father’s Day is coming up soon, and I would love to encourage you to consider giving “Talk To Your Boys” to dads you know. Joanna Schroeder and I thought a lot about fathers as we were writing it, and it’s packed with tools that help adults connect better with tween and teen boys. I would LOVE to have more men reading it! Pick it up at your local bookstore or order it now:
Amazon | Audible | Barnes & Noble | Bookshop | Books-A-Million | Walmart |

In this edition:

• Behind Every Dad Bod Is a Healthy Dad Brain

• Can Smartphones Help Explain The Drop In Birth Rates?

• Men Are in an Epidemic, Just Not the One You Think

• How an Addictive Gas Station Drug Found Allies in Trump’s Cabinet

• Andrew Tate’s Empire of Abuse

• Most Parents Track Their 18- to 25-Year-Old Kids On Their Smartphones. Is It Healthy?

• They Explain Autism — And Come Under Attack, Even From Within The Autism Community

Behind Every Dad Bod Is a Healthy Dad Brain (New York Times)

By : We already know that the children of engaged fathers show advantages across a variety of domains, from their self-regulation abilities to their social skills and educational attainment. We also know that hands-on dads relieve stress on mothers, improve their partners’ relationship satisfaction and can even buffer the risk of postpartum depression in mothers.

But as I discovered when researching my new book, becoming a committed father also directly benefits men. Men who prioritize fatherhood may lose some sleep, gain some extra weight and enjoy less free time, but they can also discover a richer life with greater meaning, purpose and connection. And when it comes to brain health and mental fitness, becoming a father is one of the best things you can do. READ MORE

Can Smartphones Help Explain The Drop In Birth Rates? (NPR)

By Scott Horsley: In a provocative new working paper titled “Is the iPhone Birth Control?” Economist Caitlin Myers argues that the spread of smartphones could explain between a third and a half of the decline in birth rates during that period.

To test that theory, she makes clever use of an accident of history that creates a kind of natural experiment. When iPhones first came out, they worked only with AT&T.

“In some areas of the country, AT&T had broadband coverage and you could get an iPhone, and in other areas, including where I live in Vermont, that coverage was much more limited,” Myers recalls. “And what you can see in this simplest of comparisons, births start to fall in the places where you can get one, and they’re not falling nearly as much in the places where you can’t.” READ MORE

Read more

Doors Closing, Doors Opening

Here’s my big news: I’m moving on from San Francisco Unified School District, where I’ve been working in since 2002. Starting in August, I’ll be teaching high school Health Education at Los Altos High School in the Mountain View-Los Altos High School District.

I know that may not seem like a big deal, but it is going to be a major shift in my day-to-day life, in large part because I’m returning to a full-time classroom teaching role. For the last 12 years I’ve been a “Teacher On Special Assignment,” supporting and coordinating the health programs in San Francisco schools. I loved this job, but it is really different than teaching high school every day.

How I Got Started As A Teacher

In 1997, I graduated from The University of Missouri-Columbia with a journalism degree, and promptly landed a job as an assistant editor at a magazine in Berkeley, California. After a couple years, I moved to online journalism during San Francisco’s dot com boom, helping ThriveOnline win a Webby Award for “Best Health Site.”

By the end of 2001, boom times had gone bust, I’d been laid off, and I was scrambling to find work. I was about to become a father for the first time, which put some extra pressure on the job hunt.

The unemployment office mentioned that they had a job retraining program called “Tech To Teaching” and asked if I had ever thought about becoming a teacher. I really had - I’d been doing volunteer work answering the phone at a hotline called San Francisco Sex Information, and we got a lot of calls from teenagers who needed basic information about their bodies, healthy relationships, and handling their emotions. It reminded me of the years I spent in college volunteering at my unversity’s Rape Education Office, where I’d often be sent out to deliver sexual assaualt prevention talks in classrooms, fraternity houses, and community spaces.

I got in touch with the health office at San Francisco Unified School District to find out if they had health teachers (they did!), and set up appointments to shadow some classes. I loved what I saw and quickly got enrolled in a credential program. My first teacher training classes started in January, and by August I was officially a health teacher with my own classroom.

Note: This was not a traditional route to teaching - I started on “emergency credential” and had to take teacher training courses at night and on weekends until I was fully certified. Instead of a year of unpaid student teaching, a professor came into my classroom and evaluated my teaching and lesson plans, consulting with me and giving tips for improvement after class was over. Supporting programs like this is often recommended by advocates like , , and as one way to help bring more men into teaching.

I Love Teaching

I was almost 28 when I started teaching high school, and I absolutely loved it. In high school health classes, we cover six big areas, all of which I found interesting:

• Nutrition and Physical Activity

• Growth, Development, and Sexual Health

• Injury Prevention and Safety

• Alcohol, Tobacco, and Other Drugs

• Mental, Emotional, and Social Health

• Personal and Community Health

I found that planning a high school class used a lot of the same skills I’d used as a journalist - taking scientific information and making it understandable and actionable, tailoring messages for specific audiences, and finding the right “hook” to pull people into a topic. It was a lot of work, but it suited me well.

What’s Changed Over Time

The world is different than when I started teaching - things like vaping, iPhones, and TikTok didn’t exist - and I’ve changed positions within my school district several times in the years since 2002. Job titles I’ve had:

• Health Education teacher - Lincoln High School

• Peer Resource teacher - Lincoln High School

• Health Education teacher - Balboa High School

• Health Education Teacher on Special Assignment - School Health Programs Department

That last one is the job I’ve had for the past 12 years, and I’ve primarily been focused on implementing the CDC’s “What Works In Schools” plan. This research-backed approach asks districts to use these three specific strategies in their schools:

1. Providing quality health education, including sexual health education.

2. Implementing systems to increase student access to health care.

3. Promoting activities to decrease bullying, increase parent engagement, and help students feel more connected to school.

One Big Frustration

In January 2026, I wrote about my worries regarding cuts to middle school health education:

In my school district, a semester of health education has long been a high school graduation requirement, and our program is seen as a model of innovation and excellence.

However, many students, families, and educators recognized that young people needed to get the information we cover before high school. That’s why, in 2015, SFUSD started its first middle school health education classes.

Since then, the program has grown steadily, with more middle schools adding health classes each year. Now most SFUSD middle schools had health classes on their rosters, and we have a terrific cadre of enthusiastic, well-trained middle school health teachers in place.

Unfortunately, we recently learned that this middle school health education program is at risk of being eliminated, and we’ve been kicking into action to save it.

I firmly believe that defunding, eliminating, or turning these classes into “electives” will harm young people. Today, I want to tell you about what we’ve been doing and why I think its important, both because we could use your support and because I think there are many lessons here that could be applied in other communities.

Unfortunately, despite my best efforts, the outcome I feared came to pass, and SFUSD’s middle school health education program was dismantled at the end of the 2025-26 school year.

It’s an outcome that has left me frustrated, sad, and angry, and served as a signal that maybe it was time to move on.

What I’m Excited About

I’m now 51, and I’m thrilled to have an opportunity to make a fresh start.

I’ve haven’t had my own classroom in over a decade, and I’m really looking forward to stretching my “teacher muscles.” I’ll be teaching 10 sections of health ed next year - 5 classes in the fall semester, and 5 in the spring - which means I’ll be reaching hundreds of students. I’ll be working with a team of strong health educators and I’m hoping we can collaborate and share resources.

I’ve done a ton of teacher coaching over the last decade, and have learned a LOT about what works (and what doesn’t). I’m looking forward to bringing that knowledge back into the classroom and working directly with students.

It’s also important to me to keep advocating for high-quality health education in schools. Being able to speak directly about some recent experiences teaching health in schools will be really useful in that regard.

I’m already looking forward to being able to say “Welcome to health class!” to a fresh group of students in the fall.

Recent Teen Health Today Highlights

• Pimples, Boobs, And Body Hair: On This Podcast, Teens Help Younger Kids Understand Puberty

  Kids have LOTS of questions about puberty. The teens on Brains On: Puberty give them real answers.

• Caffeine Pouches And Teens: What You Need To Know

  How much buzz is too much? PLUS: America’s masculinity crisis, and why are TikTok references being inserted into old books?

• Kratom? Synthetics? How To Talk To Teens About Drugs Today

  An excellent new video series is here to help

• How To Get Teen Boys To Practice Kindness, Empathy, and Support

  What Next Gen Men has learned while running a Discord server for boys

If you enjoyed this post, please forward it to someone else who might like it, and click the ❤️ or 🔁 button on this post so more people can discover it on Substack. 🙏🏼

Hi Friends,

I’m excited to share a new podcast series with you today. It’s called Puberty! (The Podcast), and it’s produced by the team behind the wonderful show Brains On.

I did a little behind-the-scenes work on the scripts, and I appear in “guest expert” mode giving some advice in Episode 4. The real stars, though, are the teen hosts who talk about their recent experiences with puberty. Their honest reflections and smart insights really make the show. Check out the trailer to get a sense of what it’s all about.

Big love,
Christopher

It’s Here! Brains On Universe Presents…Puberty! (The Podcast)

Puberty! It’s a lot. There are the awkward conversations and the questions we’re too nervous to ask and the sometimes uncomfortable experience of living in a body that’s changing fast (and publicly!).

This podcast is here to help. Hosted by Molly Bloom, of the award-winning science podcast Brains On, and co-hosted by high schoolers who’ve just been through it, Puberty! (The podcast) is for everybody — and every body.

Designed for kids 7-12, the show covers everything from brain chemicals to consent, in a straight-forward and digestible package. This is a safe space for young people to understand their bodies and their brains, and it’s a resource for parents to tackle otherwise difficult topics.

Experts, including Dr. Cara Natterson (Less Awkward), (Talk to Your Boys), Nora Gelperin (Advocates for Youth), and Erin Walsh (Spark & Stitch Institute), provide science-filled explanations and answer listener questions.

Find it wherever you listen to podcasts or at brainson.org/puberty.

Subscribe now

Episode 1: What Is Puberty Anyway?

Kids grow a lot during puberty, and they also go through changes that make it possible for them to eventually have kids of their own. But it’s not just your body that changes during puberty. Your brain goes through changes, too, as it rewires to become more like an adult brain!

It’s like your whole body is under construction. So it’s no wonder that our listeners have lots of questions about this period in life.

In this episode we’re covering the basics. What is puberty? What’s kicking off these changes? And when can you expect them to happen? Dr. Cara Natterson from Less Awkward is here to help us answer.

And remember: No two people go through puberty exactly the same way. It’s different for everyone!

Episode 2: Skin, Sweat and Hair

In this episode, we’re talking about some of the first body changes you might notice when you go through puberty. We’re answering a lot of listener questions in this episode including: Why do grownups have hair where kids don’t? Why do armpits get stinkier during puberty? Why do zits happen? Why do you get oilier when you’re a teen?

Dr. Cara Natterson, author of The Care and Keeping of You and host of the podcast This is So Awkward, joins us again to help us navigate tricky issues dealing with your skin, sweat and hair.

Episode 3: Growth Spurts

In this episode we’re getting into how hormones kickstart all types of growth, during puberty. We answer kids’ questions like: what’s the deal with growing pains, why and how do our voices change and why do we get breasts. Short answer... it’s hormones. Listen to hear how human growth hormone, and estrogen, progesterone and testosterone activate and change our bodies.

This episode’s word of the day will both put you to sleep AND wake you up! Tune in to find out.

Subscribe now

Episode 4: Reproduction

Ovaries and testicles are like hormone factories — and they also make the cells needed to create new humans! But what exactly do these body parts do? And how do they work?

In this episode, we’re getting to know the reproductive organs: ovaries and testicles (because understanding your body gives you the confidence to take care of it!). Pediatrician Dr. Cara Natterson and health educator Christopher Pepper are here to help us break it all down.

More Episodes On The Way!

Find them wherever you listen to podcasts or at brainson.org/puberty

Recent Teen Health Today Highlights

• Caffeine Pouches And Teens: What You Need To Know

  How much buzz is too much? PLUS: America’s masculinity crisis, and why are TikTok references being inserted into old books?

• Kratom? Synthetics? How To Talk To Teens About Drugs Today

  An excellent new video series is here to help

• How To Get Teen Boys To Practice Kindness, Empathy, and Support

  What Next Gen Men has learned while running a Discord server for boys

• My Favorite Mom On TV Is...

  10 writers reflect on the most memorable mothers on TV today

If you enjoyed this post, please forward it to someone else who might like it, and click the ❤️ or 🔁 button on this post so more people can discover it on Substack. 🙏🏼

• I’m Christopher Pepper, an award-winning health educator and the co-author of the bestselling book Talk To Your Boys.

• During the week, I send out Teen Health Today posts that are free for all to read - the most recent is Kratom? Synthetics? How To Talk To Teens About Drugs Today.

• I regularly send out curated collections of news stories and essays like the one you are reading right now. Think of me as your friend who keeps up with everything and sends you the most interesting stuff.

• These Sunday news roundups are paywalled to give you a gentle nudge to upgrade your Teen Health Today subscription. Lucky for you, here’s a button that will give you a 30% discount:

Get 30% off forever

In this edition:

• America Has a Masculinity Crisis

• They’re Small, Discreet And Everywhere. Young People Are Obsessed With Caffeine Pouches

• A Flood of New, Deadlier Drugs

• For Far-Right Extremists, The Rise Of A New Enemy: Women

• Why Is TikTok in This Book From 2006?

• Looksmaxxing Isn’t Just A TikTok Trend – It Often Reflects Severe Body Image Issues In Teen Boys And Young Men

• Texas School Police Pepper-Sprayed, Tackled and Tasered Students

America Has a Masculinity Crisis (New York Times)

By Nadja Spiegelman, Frederick Joseph, and Ruth Whippman Young men are in crisis. While the left tells men to stay in their lane, members of the manosphere and the far right are welcoming them with open arms. In a conversation about masculinity in a post-#MeToo world, the Opinion culture editor Nadja Spiegelman talks to the authors and about what a healthier version of manhood could look like — and how we can get there. WATCH

From Christopher - WHY DID I CHOOSE THIS STORY? Ruth Whippman’s book “Boy Mom,” and “Talk To Your Boys” are often paired up as reading suggestions, and I love that she and Frederick Joseph are helping more people have reflective, provocative conversations what’s going on with boys and men right now and what we can do about it.

They’re Small, Discreet And Everywhere. Young People Are Obsessed With Caffeine Pouches (USA Today)

By Rachel Hale: On an April evening, nearly a hundred bikini-clad saunagoers descend on Othership Flatiron, the sauna-and-ice-bath spa that has become an Instagrammable landmark of New York City’s wellness scene.

Inside, a DJ blasts house music as people rotate between 32-degree cold plunges and a cedar sauna, slipping small white pouches between their gums and lips. Palm-sized plastic canisters of the product are lined up in neat rows on the counter.The pouches – flavored Blue Raspberry and Fruit Punch – weren’t nicotine.

The event is hosted by Wip, a start-up behind flavored “energy pouches.” The products are part of a fast-growing category of caffeine pouches marketed as a trendier, cheaper and more discreet alternative to coffee, energy drinks and pre-workout powders. In recent months the pouches, which have circulated in social media mentions for some time, have been popping up more frequently in the wellness sphere and in social settings. READ MORE

WHY DID I CHOOSE THIS STORY? There’s been a lot of focus recently on nicotine pouches, but I haven’t seen much coverage of this new pouch trend, and it seems like something we should keep an eye on.

Read more

I hope you’re having a good week! One of the most rewarding projects I’ve been involved with over the last few years is helping create TheNewDrugTalk.org, a site that provides “free, evidence-based resources to help families understand today’s drug risks—and have the conversations that matter.”

Today, I’m sharing some brand new videos from The New Drug Talk that focus on some of the biggest emerging topics in teen substance use.

As a health teacher, I understand how much drugs have changed in recent years, and know that adults need all the help they can get in keeping up with those changes and understanding how to to effectively talk with teens about them. I hope these resources help!

Big love,
Christopher

Is Kratom Safe For Your Teen?

Right now, a middle schooler—12, 13 or 14 years old—can walk into a convenience store in many states and buy a product that acts on the brain like an opioid, without anyone asking a single question. It sits on the same shelf as energy drinks and protein bars. It’s called kratom—and the most concentrated forms, like 7-hydroxymitragynine (7OH), are highly addictive, sold without warning labels and legal in most states.

In this New Drug Talk conversation experts explain what parents should know about the growing market of unregulated substances being sold to young people.

What you’ll learn:

• Where kratom originated and how it’s being deceptively marketed for health and well being

• What forms kratom is sold in: teas, gummies, shots

• How concentrated kratom extracts like 7-hydroxymitragynine (7OH) affect the brain

• Why adolescent brains are more vulnerable to addiction and substance dependence

• The gas station products teens may already recognize, including Feel Free and other brands

• Why “natural” and “legal” do not always mean safe

• How to start calm, informed conversations with your teen about kratom

What Are Today's Synthetic Drugs?

Xylazine (the “zombie drug”). Nitazenes. Fentanyl. Fake prescription pills. Today’s drug supply is changing faster than most parents—and even many professionals—can keep up with. A new wave of synthetic substances are appearing in communities across the country and reshaping overdose risk for young people.

Many counterfeit pills are designed to look exactly like real prescription medications, including Adderall, Xanax and Percocet. In many cases, the pill a teen thinks they’re taking is not the substance they’re actually taking.

In this New Drug Talk conversation experts explain what’s happening in the current drug supply, why today’s risks are different from previous generations, and how parents can have informed, practical conversations with their teens.

What you’ll learn:

• Why today’s drug supply is fundamentally different from the past

• What’s causing more overdose deaths in our country that any drug previous to it

• Why fentanyl has dramatically changed overdose risk for young people

• What xylazine—known as the zombie drug or 'tranq'—does to the body

• Why naloxone (Narcan) may not reverse all substances involved in an overdose

• What nitazenes are and why experts are concerned about their potency

• How counterfeit prescription pills are made to look identical to prescription medications teens are familiar with

• How to start calm, direct conversations with your teen about fake prescription pills

Your Teen Needs Your To Talk About Drugs

The drug talk has changed. It’s not one big conversation—it’s dozens of small ones, built on trust, curiosity and the right techniques. In this video, experts walk parents through the conversations that actually work—moving beyond fear-based warnings to real, lasting connections with your teen that support their mental health and well-being.

What you’ll learn:

• Why talking to your kids about drugs won’t put the idea in their head

• How to talk to your teen about substances without pushing them away

• What to say when you think your child is not doing well

• How to model healthy behaviors, especially outlets to stress

• Why your teen needs to hear your expectations out loud

• Tools to help your kid safely exit a peer pressure situation

• How everyday family habits build the resilience that keeps kids safe

Recent Teen Health Today Highlights

• How To Get Teen Boys To Practice Kindness, Empathy, and Support

  What Next Gen Men has learned while running a Discord server for boys

• My Favorite Mom On TV Is...

  10 writers reflect on the most memorable mothers on TV today

• Bigorexia, Betting, and Bros: Helping Boys Navigate Today’s World

  An extraordinary panel recorded live at the Common Sense Media Summit

• Outside The Manosphere

  What to do after watching “Louis Theroux: Inside The Manosphere”

If you enjoyed this post, please forward it to someone else who might like it, and click the ❤️ or 🔁 button on this post so more people can discover it on Substack. 🙏🏼